| | The following is an open letter to the drunk girl who drove into our woods last year:
How could I have been so insensitive to be unaware of the great favor you did for me by driving into our woods. I am truly inconsiderate. As I was cutting back and trimming various vegetation in our front yard that need to be trimmed/cut back before spring, I did my yearly tradition of hunting a break, any hole in the woods that I might toss the trimmings into. This is normally difficult as our woods, even in the dead of winter are very dense. Then I saw a HUGE hole in the woods at a convenient location, and thought to myself, 'now how could I have missed that great spot for the past 4 years?" As my eyes drifted down to the skid marks leading to the giant hole it all came back to me. Good times. Times of summer fun. Times of four Waltermyers under one roof. Times when we thought the economy was in the toilet. Times when drunk individuals could freely barrel into our wood unannounced.
So thank you random drunk girl, wherever you are. Thanks for the memories. Thanks for the enormous hole in which I can now haul yard clippings into. Our woods are very much alive and will inevitably swallow this hole, whole, within the next few months, so my only request is that you make this a yearly occurrence. Late August is fine. I'll leave the light on for you. And this time, I promise, we won't call the cops.
A fresh pile of yard clippings is waiting to cushion your decent.
Yours Truly,
David Waltermyer
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| | Posted 3/8/2009 11:01 PM - 66 Views - 12 eProps - 6 comments
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